CAST OF CHARACTERS

  • Harper: A mild-mannered, likable know-it-all. Super quirky, but not weird. Reluctant to accept the fact that there are some things she hasn’t learned yet. (Alto/Mezzo)

  • Alexis: Harper’s best friend. Speaks with a lateral lisp, very odd, and typically cares way too much. (Alto)

  • Jessie: A stressed out seventh-grader who feels extreme pressure to maintain her reputation. Sassy and charismatic, she reigns in and focuses her often distracting friends, Katie and Heather. (Alto)

  • Katie: Aggressive, quick-thinking, and excitable. Probably wears one of those tee shirts with a cute bunny on it but a really mean phrase written below it. (Mezzo)

  • Heather: Ditzy, but knows how to work people over. The type of girl who gets tons of likes on social media, but also eats cold hot dogs with no shame. (Soprano)

  • Patrick: Your average artsy boy, extremely upset at the fact that he can’t sing like he used to. (Bari-Tenor)

  • Nate: Patrick’s helpful best friend. Awkward around those of the opposite sex, easily worked up and overwhelmed. (Baritone)

  • Joe: A very short, slowly developing boy. Despite a fierce yearning for a growth spurt, his hormones just can’t seem to get the memo. Written to be played by a female. (Wide vocal range with a great A4 belt!)

  • Melanie: Joe’s good friend. A talented piano player. Friendly and pleasant, but extremely defensive. (Alto)

  • Vanessa: President (and likely dictator?) of the student council. Orderly, strict, and no­-nonsense. Drill sergeant in a middle schooler’s body. (Mezzo)

  • Sam: Vanessa’s assistant. Extremely loyal to Vanessa, regardless of how demanding she is of her. Somehow simultaneously flustered and organized. (Soprano)

  • Aaron: Jock with a good heart. A little dumb, but he makes up for it in charm.

  • Will: Aaron’s lady-crazy friend.

  • Nick: Mean and sweaty. That’s pretty much it.

  • Ms. Lemon: Science teacher with likely possession of a dull personal life.

  • Mr. Michaels: PE teacher. Hates working, likes to party.

  • Janitor: Went to prison once. Female.

  • Principal: Walk on role from school administrator or local celebrity.

  • Mikey: a held-­back student with the body hair to prove it (also member of ensemble)

  • Quinn: a sunny-looking, computer-hacking enigma of a student with a passion for Christ (also member of ensemble)

  • Ensemble: The pubescent students of Woodrow Wilson Middle School. Horse Girl, Theatre Geek, Scene Kid, Athlete, etc. Also appear as teachers in “Teacher Avenue.”